First Day of Preschool

It feels like the first day of school. So I took a picture for my mom. Calling it the first day of business preschool. Seems fitting - there's a long way to go and it's the official physical start.

Sunny on a cloudy day. Monitor in hand. Airpods on. Train, tracked. Why don't people walk up the escalator? Arrived. Bright lights. Windows. Plants. Hello. Company name. Badge. Thank you. Scan. Empty desk. Sat.

....and now here we are. The lights are still on, but narrowed. Like a beam illuminating just this desk because here, at this desk, there's only one thing to do: get to work.

....

Right.

....

Although it's unlike that first day of preschool because, as I was told, I had unbounded energy until the moment I arrived and realized I didn't want to leave my mother's side. There was a similar moment, after the rush and excitement caught up, when I first sat in that chair and overhear my office mate boldly declare "we're walking into the office of every Fortune 500 in Chicago...", because I felt out of place. A bit uncomfortable. An imposter.

This is all great. I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be.

And then the moment passes.

Just met my office mates - they're cool! He even came up to me first. One group is working on automated robotics and another is selling AI customer service. I should've came here sooner. But sooner doesn't exist, just like how tomorrow doesn't exist, either. Environment matters and you need to create it. The present being the only time to do it (or anything, really).

Me? "I'm trying to do my own thing." "Good for you". Then he proceeds to tell a story of someone he knows that worked a similar job and successfully made "his own thing".

I look out the window. I see the partial reflection of my poor posture. That's a problem for another day. Kombucha on tap! Banger! (and no added sugar, i checked the brand online)

Who the fuck am i?? it's a big day but also not a big day at the same time. is that how life goes by?

Palantir is in the same building. It's crowded. Very startup-y. I love it. During the tour a dude was in this cubicle for his private office that was only as wide as his desk, on the window it said "something" capital (couldn't remember the full name), and both monitors were just two bright screens of excel lol.

Just had to pinch myself. i've always wanted to work at a startup. now, i kinda am. i think the just-graduated 22-year-old and the high school lawn care business owner cutting grass for 12 hours a day would both be pinching themselves too.

What will I do? simple, i will: build stuff -> learn about it -> write about it -> talk with people -> repeat.

Besides, the only thing left to do is the work. And everyone here is faking it, anyways.